Mid Month Thought For The Day

I was talking to a health care professional last night (no names, no pack drill) and somehow 2 things emerged with chatting to them and their partner (very discreet this  Iam not using he/she etc). Firstly women seem to have sympathy with other women who slice off their partners nether regions and feed them down the waste disposal unit, and men dont seem to share the same sympathetic tendencies.
Seconfly, if you are going to pick kumara make sure you are fully clothed otherwise you may have some explaining to do when you get admitted to hospital with one stuck up your back passage. I can only suppose the guy with the veggie wedged up his Kyhber Pass was unfortunate to have fallen upon the Kiwi vegetable.............

Thre must be other ways of getting your "5 a day"............

P & L

Weekend!

Well I know you have been worried about me - work has been hellish and I have not known where I have been or what I should be doing

I certainly did not imagine I would have to be dealing with such stress!

Anyway, I will get up even earlier every morning to try and blog each day

Blogging at work is not an option, lunchbreaks are for wimps and I will continue the 7.30am to 5pm regime as best I can

I found myself saying to the lady with whom I spare an office "I think I have not had my afternoon nap at work for nearly a month now" Sometimes when reading the most deathly dull tomes I did find my head nodding! But no more! I am a reborn refreshed and vigourous employee desperately trying to solve the problems of the world.

P & L

Monday Morning Blues

Up prowling round the house at 3am, snuck back to bed at about 6am in the hope of grabbing an hour

I am dreading the week at work - it is going to be challenging

Drank a needlessly large amount fo beer and wine which helped me fall asleep but not keep me asleep!

Sorry to start the week on a downer but I thought I should be honest with you dear reader

Peace and Love

M

Book Club

Another month gone and another poorly attended book club

We talked about the book briefly and then got tucked into discussing some of the absent members..............

Still the highlight of the evening was actually finding where it was being held - TomTom did me proud - God bless Mrs W for buying it for me

Why do I put myself through book club every month? More to follow

Tax Returns

Am I the only person who actively rages against tax returns? Carry that number into Box 73 (b) now stand up and turn around 3 times before dividing Box 45 (q) by the number of toes of your first pet and shout out "Wibble"

I am honest by nature as you know dear reader and law abiding as well but sometimes I have the urge to write something seditious on the blessed return

Another Joke funnier there than here

Why do all Chinese tourists end up in Middlesex? They get into the taxi and say "Harrow Taxi driver"

Thank goodness that isnt funny anymore!

Peace

If I was Happy Foot The Penguin

I would tell them to bugger off if they tried to extradite back to the South Pole

Free food and accommodation, an adoring nation and probably as many birds as you could handle - sounds pretty good to me

But what would I know?

Why dont polar bears eat penguins? They struggle with their wrappers - another joke that is funnier in the UK than in NZ

Another Cold One

Phew - that was a lot of ice on the windscreen this morning

Bit of a shock when I fed the cat earlier

Be careful on slippy slidey surfaces

Last year after millions of dollars of research it was found that putting socks over your shoes made for safer walking (and warmer shoes I guess)